Every season, the Drama After Dark team gathers ‘round the (currently virtual) conference room table to watch the latest and greatest in British dramas. This month, our colleagues at MASTERPIECE delivered a deluge of new dramas, including Miss Scarlet & The Duke, a feminist detective series set in Victorian London. I’m here to recap all the mysteries (and the romance) of the season as it happens (and we’re also covering the show on Drama After Dark).
Your boss passed you over for a promotion. In retaliation, you basically made the newspaper print the Marvel Comics version of your lady friend doing your job for you. And now you have to meet with that boss first thing in the morning to share unsatisfactory job performance statistics?
Superintendent Slimy: This meeting could have been an email!
Duke Silver: First of all, we’re at least a century away from that invention, and even if we weren’t, corporate culture, and indeed, your orders dictate that I painstakingly read you these spreadsheets.
Superintendent Slimy: Think outside of the box, dude — are you some kind of nerd who enjoys spending hours putting this stuff together? Just hit the highlights.
Duke Silver, closing the file on days of painstaking work: Crime is up, but we’re getting better at detection, especially murder and mob stuff.
Superintendent Slimy: Great, see, not that hard. Just send an interoffice memo next time via pigeon or whatever. Except for later: there’s a little happy hour with the top brass and I need you to show up to rattle those numbers off if needed.
Duke Silver: Surely someone as smart and fancy as you doesn’t need little old me…
Superintendent Slimy: Good try, but no dice: if you want that promotion you’ll come to my stuffy party with your cute lil spreadsheets. Formal dress! No kilts!
Ok first of all, I’m now furious that we were treated to the concept of Duke Silver in a kilt only to have the possibility rudely ripped away. The kilt ban has been lifted for a century at this point; be cool, Slimy! Apparently, no one is interested in letting our man live, because fellow detective Frank shows up in Duke Silver's office bearing both formal clothes and jokes about said formal clothes.
Frank: You’re gonna look so cute!! Need any tips?
Duke Silver: On how to look like a bum? No thanks. Get out.
Frank: Rude. I’m gonna go cry about it. Toodles!!!
Perhaps I can forgive the kilt omission, because the very nice writers scripted in a whole scene where our pal changes into his fancy outfit. Slowly. And with a lot of rage.
Anyway, just as he’s finished, some broad busts into the office. Weirdly, it’s not Victoria Mars, but she is involved: the visitor is Ivy, and she’s freaking out.
Duke Silver, exhausted: What’s the problem now?
Ivy: Victoria Mars has disappeared!
Not good! Here’s the deal: Ivy went to go visit her sick mother for the night, and when she got back, Victoria Mars was nowhere to be found. The bed hadn’t been slept in, and no, Victoria Mars didn’t just make her bed this morning because apparently our heroine is an inveterate slob.
Duke Silver: What’s the big deal? She’s probably at work!
Ivy: I went to the office, doofus: it’s locked up, and no one has seen her! She’s in trouble! She always tells me where she’s going. If anything happens to her I will LOSE IT.
Duke Silver: Ugh, fine. When did you last see her?
Apparently, Victoria Mars had a meeting yesterday morning with none other than Super Rooper, so Duke Silver heads over to retrace her steps, where he finds that Super Rooper has company of the Germanic persuasion.
Super Rooper: Wow, you look nice for once!
Hildegard: Yeah, you look dashing, bro.
Super Rooper: Oh gosh, where are my manners? Duke Silver, meet Hildegard’s lovely niece! Drinks? Oh, and Tilly, we know Duke Silver because he’s a detective who sometimes works with Victoria Mars. And I’m the sole investor in her agency.
Duke Silver, getting increasingly irate: YES. Victoria Mars. I hear you had a meeting with her yesterday morning?
Super Rooper: Oh, yeah, we were meant to meet yesterday but when I got there she was all aflutter — she’d figured something out, asked if we could postpone our meeting so she could go deal with it.
Hildegard: Yeah, she left after that and was in a huge hurry: I helped her get a cab over to the morgue.
You know what that means: we get to go visit the persnickety Morgue Bureaucrat, and in a surprise to no one, he’s annoyed. Again.
Morgue Bureaucrat: She’s SO annoying. She won’t listen to me! Please, I am begging you, control your wife!
Duke Silver: Once again, I remind you that she’s not my wife, and perhaps more importantly, that I have no more hope of controlling her than you do. When was she here?
Morgue Bureaucrat: At the same time as the city coroner! It made me look bad!
Duke Silver: I’m having a bad day. I’m very annoyed. I'm in formalwear. Please just tell me what time you saw her last.
Morgue Bureaucrat: 9am! She busted in here with a million questions until I kicked her out. Mostly regarding smallpox, how it’s transmitted, and if it can be prevented. I tried to ignore her but she said it was a matter of life and death. And then she ran off!
Well, guess it’s time for some old fashioned detective work, so Duke Silver heads over to Victoria Mars’ office to see what he can figure out. And, because apparently Papa Mars enjoys appearing in his spectral advisory role, Duke Silver is also allowed a minor apparition. As a treat.
Papa Mars: Not sure what to do?
Duke Silver: You always do that, you know: tell me to do something in the form of a question. It’s annoying.
Papa Mars: It’s effective: you need to be able to draw your own conclusions.
Duke Silver: Yeah, if by my own conclusions you mean YOUR conclusions. Separately, your kid is killing me dude.
Papa Mars: LOL been there: imagine raising her. And you, for that matter.
Duke Silver: I miss you, man.
Papa Mars: I miss you too, kid. Now go out there and find my daughter.
Decision made, Duke Silver starts rifling through Victoria Mars’ desk with purpose, quickly finding a clue in her day planner: a note that says, rather ominously, “Woodbridge Prison: Cell 99.” Seems like a good lead, because we quickly get a shot of the prison in question, abandoned and creepy, made even more so by Victoria Mars’ cries for help. Obviously, Duke Silver makes his way into the building and starts calling out for our friend. He quickly finds her discarded hat, but not much else, and seems like he’s about to give up when he hears her yelling.
Victoria Mars: Hey! I’m down here! In cell 98!
Duke Silver, having a laugh: What are you doing in there?
Victoria Mars: I’m locked in, you jackass!
Duke Silver: Lol, why?
Victoria Mars: Just get me out!!
Duke Silver: I’m coming, I’m coming, cool your jets. What are you doing in there anyway?
Victoria Mars: I’ll tell you in a second once you open the door — I’ve been stuck in here for hours! My lockpicking tools are in my bag, have at it. Separately, why are you dressed like James Bond?
Duke Silver: You want to talk about my sartorial choices, or do you want me to get you out of there?
Victoria Mars decides that’s a fair point, and settles for some backseat lock-picking. Despite the fact that it took him several hours to track her down, Duke Silver insists that locating her wasn’t too hard, given that she leaves a trail of destruction in her wake, much like Godzilla. Or the military industrial complex.
Duke Silver: Why are you here, anyway?
Victoria Mars: I found my dad’s old casebook. You know how he was missing for a couple of days before he died? I had assumed he was off drinking and gambling but now I think he was here.
Duke Silver: Yeah, I saw the casebook too — lots of debts in there.
Victoria Mars: Yes, but cell 99 was underlined. Twice. And I looked around in here, the cells only go up to 98; there’s probably another wing we can look for once you get me out.
Duke Silver: Look, I loved your dad too. But he was acting really weird near the end; we hadn’t seen him sober for months.
Victoria Mars: I was in here investigating and that door slammed shut. And I think I heard footsteps.
Duke Silver: Forgive me if your hunch isn’t super convincing; this place is deserted. Ugh, this stupid lock!
Victoria Mars: And to think you implied you didn't need my help picking the lock.
Duke Silver: Well these locks are extra challenging, they’re prison cells!
Victoria Mars: Give me the tools, I’ll try from the inside.
Duke Silver: It’s filthy in here. And now I’m going to be late to the club, because of you!
Victoria Mars: I actually am sorry about that.
Duke Silver: It’s fine, probably for the best: I can barely keep up with those guys and I don’t fit in at all.
Victoria Mars: Yeah, because they all shmoozed their way in and you got to where you are through skill and hard work. Ignore those guys.
Duke Silver: Stop being nice to me, it freaks me out. LOL I wonder what Superintendent Slimy would think of you.
Victoria Mars: I’m sure I’ll meet him eventually, and you’ll be able to find out.
Duke Silver: Uhhhh sure.
Victoria Mars: You didn’t tell him we work together?
Duke Silver: It’s bad enough that he’s read about you in the papers! You’re just gonna get married and do mom stuff eventually anyway, that’s how things work!
Victoria Mars: WOW. WOW. How dare you!
Duke Silver: How dare I help you? Yeah, good point!
Victoria Mars: Yeah, this has been super helpful, thank you. Great work. Just go to your dumb club, I don’t need you.
Duke Silver: FINE.
Victoria Mars: FINE.
Like the grumpy toddlers they are, they clearly both need a second to cool down, which they take after much impotent screaming (both), throwing of tools (Victoria Mars), and storming off (Duke Silver). That storm-off turns out to be a good idea, because Duke Silver stumbles on a wall of cell keys. Unfortunately, he also stumbles on an ominous stranger who isn’t interested in making conversation, but is interested in trying to stab our pal. Duke Silver has a gun, but Knife Guy still rushes him, leading to some fun grappling punctuated by Victoria Mars yelling that she actually does want Duke Silver to come back and help her, thanks very much. Downstairs, Duke Silver resorts to biting (gross, but effective) but ends up in an impasse when Knife Guy retrieves his blade. Upstairs, Victoria Mars finally succeeds at picking the lock, only to hear a heavy tread on the stair. She brandishes her lockpick, but thankfully, it’s just Duke Silver.
Duke Silver: So, you were right, there was someone else here. But it's fine:
Victoria Mars: Uh, well we're not going anywhere until I look at your arm; I can’t carry you if you bleed out. Take off your jacket so I can get in there.
Duke Silver: It was expensive!
Victoria Mars: Well fine, I’ll cut it off. Where did Knife Guy go?
Duke Silver: No clue, but he was hurt too. Crap, my watch is broken!
Victoria Mars: And which of your various floozies gave you that?
Duke Silver: It was your dad, actually — he gave it to me when I made detective. And of course he had to get a dig in at me in the process — it has “tempus fugit” engraved on the back to remind me not to procrastinate.
Victoria Mars: Well, we better take that advice now. Let’s get going.
Duke Silver: You owe me a jacket AND a watch.
Victoria Mars: Rude, I didn’t break your watch!
Duke Silver: Yeah, but I’m only here because of you!
He takes out his gun to cover them, but then stumbles into the wall. The gun tumbles out of his hand, and falls into the area below the cells, where it goes off, startling everyone. Duke Silver immediately apologizes for his bad gun safety (as he should), but thankfully they’re both ok. Since he doesn’t have a second sidearm, they head downstairs to retrieve it, but Knife Guy got there first, and immediately starts shooting at them before falling to the ground, possibly passed out from blood loss. Taking cover in an abandoned cell, they plot strategy: Victoria Mars suggests a double envelopment (they come from opposite directions, distracting the guy so they can knock him down), but Duke Silver rather boringly runs into the fray to try and fight Knife Guy solo. Since Knife Guy isn’t actually passed out, and Duke Silver’s injured his punching arm, this isn’t a great plan, but thankfully Victoria Mars doesn’t wait around for him to fail, implementing her strategy, and distracting Knife Guy just long enough for Duke Silver to knock away the gun and knock out Knife Guy. Hooray!
Now that Knife Guy is out for the count, Victoria Mars has a second to get a good look at his face, and realizes why Knife Guy might look familiar: he was the doctor who “found Papa Mars in the street, dead” in the first episode.
That’s certainly suspicious, so Duke Silver searches Knife Guy’s pockets, finding brass knuckles and a key to the infamous cell 99. Our dynamic duo is locked into the prison (probably by Knife Guy), so Victoria Mars gets to lockpicking, again. Her plan is to immediately start searching for cell 99. Duke Silver’s plan? Get backup so they don’t get surprised by a dodgy character/locked in/stabbed again. Regardless, they both agree that all signs now suggest that Papa Mars was investigating something serious, and might have been murdered for his trouble. Just then, Knife Guy wakes up.
Victoria Mars: Who are you?
Duke Silver: And where’s the key you used to lock us in?
Knife Guy: Untie me and I’ll tell ya.
Victoria Mars: No thanks. Anyway, you’re super badly injured, if you don’t help us get out you’ll die soon.
Knife Guy: Meh, I don’t think so. See, I sent for backup, and they’ll be here soon.
Duke Silver: You’re bluffing.
Knife Guy: I’m not. And if they send who I think, that guy is MESSED UP. He’ll do some particularly nasty things to your lady friend there.
One of the keys fits, but doesn’t turn, and unfortunately, they’re out of time. The aforementioned backup is here, and making his slow descent into the cell area with a creepy heavy boot tread. Just to make it worse, Knife Guy provides some helpful backstory on the mystery man: he had a bad childhood, having been sold to a travelling freak show at the age of six for being huge, and thereafter having his tongue cut out for crying too much. The gun isn’t going to be much help, since it’s out of bullets, and everyone knows Duke Silver’s arm is broken. Things are not looking good for our friends! However, since this isn’t the last episode of the show, Victoria Mars finally gets the key to turn, and they slip through the door before locking it again, with Huge Mystery Guy and Knife Guy trapped inside.
Duke Silver: Man, you’re the worst: I never run away from a fight! I could have taken him, I bet my arm isn’t even that broken!
Victoria Mars: Yes, yes, you’re very brave and masculine, now let’s get out of here before that guy gets out the way he came in. This whole place looks the same; did you ever come here when it was open?
Duke Silver: No, there are a lot of prisons in this town.
Victoria Mars: Well, did you know they closed this place two years ago? Due to a smallpox outbreak?
Duke Silver: Uh, yeah, sure did.
Victoria Mars: Then you definitely also know that smallpox virus can be reactivated on a hot enough day. It’s warm in here, right?
The dynamic duo make their way to the basement, where they find another dead end and a room full of creepy Victorian Era gas masks which are just as unsettling as you’re imagining. According to Victoria Mars’ research, the masks are left over from the fumigation of the building, which was done to keep the rats from spreading smallpox everywhere.
Duke Silver: This creepy abandoned building is definitely a good place for a hideout though; no one would come here. I wonder what they’re concealing.
Victoria Mars: When you come back to do a proper investigation I’m coming along.
Duke Silver: Lol, cute. No you’re not. Are you sure it’s safe to even be here now?
Victoria Mars: Do you actually want to know, or are you just changing the subject?
Duke Silver:
Victoria Mars: Yeah, it’s safe, unless you’re a rat. Poor things.
Duke Silver: What a softie, your dad was the same; remember when he shot that dog and then got all sad about it?
Victoria Mars: Uh, no?
Duke Silver: My mistake, must have been someone else! Anyway, look, the exit!
Victoria Mars: I really hope you don’t bet too high when you play cards, you have a super obvious tell.
Duke Silver: Ugh, fine: remember when your dog died? It didn’t get killed instantly after being hit by a carriage, your dad had to euthanize it. And then I had to comfort you.
Victoria Mars: OH right, the time you kissed me!
Duke Silver: Yes, and as we’ve discussed in the past, you liked it!
Before they get too far down the path of re-litigating The Kiss, they hear a man calling for help down one of the many creepy staircases. On the way, they find a room full of hanging papers (maybe counterfeit money?), and, finally, cell 99. Carefully, they open the door, and find a fella named Nathaniel who’s clearly been kept against his will and trained to expect violence. I was right: that paper is counterfeit cash he’s been forced to create, and he's been trapped there for a while. This old timey Abagnale is pretty darn good at forgery, and Duke Silver is suitably impressed.
Old Timey Abagnale: Look, I was forced. Don’t send me to jail!
Duke Silver: Fine, I promise: tell me who these guys are and I’ll keep you out of lockup.
Before Old Timey Abagnale gives them any information, they hear gunshots, and decide to run for it. Seeing Duke Silver’s gun in his belt, Old Timey Abagnale attempts to shoot his shot, but the gun’s empty, so our dynamic duo aren’t that scared of him, just annoyed. He bolts outside, pursued by Duke Silver, only to run into a gas mask-wearing fella with a shotgun, who immediately fires on Old Timey Abagnale.
Duke Silver: I’m a cop. If you shoot me, all of my coworkers will hunt you down.
Masked Shooter:
Victoria Mars, running into the fray: Or I’ll shoot you. I’ve got a lot of bullets in here, and I won’t stop until I take you out or I die.
Victoria Mars is a much better liar than her friend, so the guy buys it and beats a retreat. Once he leaves, she tends to Old Timey Abagnale, sending Duke Silver for help. Once they’re alone, Old Timey Abagnale passes out, but not before telling our girl that she reminds him of her dad. Later, everyone returns back to investigate. The gunman? Gone, as are the guys who attacked them. Old Timey Abagnale is en route to the hospital, and is likely to survive. In the cell, they find tens of thousands of pounds worth of counterfeit currency; an operation which would have taken months to pull off, which implies that they’re up against a truly scary group.
Victoria Mars: Don’t look at me like that, out with it.
Duke Silver: I’m just gonna share some deductions with you.
Victoria Mars: Stop being reasonable and calm, you know that freaks me out.
Duke Silver: These guys almost definitely murdered your father, and they made sure it looked natural. They brought his body home, where you still live.
Victoria Mars: I’m not scared of them.
Duke Silver: Yeah, but I am. I will consult you on this, but you need to stay out of it! Your dad would legit murder me himself if I let anything happen to you. And you’re going to have police protection until we solve the case.
Before she can argue, Frank arrives with new evidence, which he thinks will be too much for Victoria Mars to see. Duke Silver, finally on board, tells everyone that she can handle it, and then heads off. In the bowels of the prison, Knife Guy and Huge Mystery Guy are both dead, shot in the head, possibly by the same masked shooter who Victoria Mars ran off.
Victoria Mars: But why kill them?
Duke Silver: To punish them for letting us get away, most likey.
Speaking of punishment, Duke Silver might be in for one from Superintendent Slimy. Our friend explains that he had to miss drinks due to, well, doing his job.
Duke Silver: Anyway, we found £68K, and a forger who must’ve been kept captive for months. A gang like this will act quickly, we’ll need to work hard to catch them. Also, remember Papa Mars?
Superintendent Slimy: Oh, that drunk? Yeah.
Duke Silver: I would describe him as a retired DI, but whatever. Anyway, I think he was killed as part of this, so I’ve ordered a protective detail for his daughter.
Superintendent Slimy: She’s the worst. Does she really need it?
Duke Silver: Yes.
Superintendent Slimy: Ugh, fine. Dismissed.
Duke Silver: Actually, I have something to say to you: Victoria Mars is the only reason we found out about this in the first place. And this isn't the first time: she’s helped me solve other crimes too.
Back at home, the lady in question pours over her dad’s case notes, and imagines a chat with Papa Mars.
Victoria Mars: I’m gonna go Liam Neeson on their asses, Pop. I will find them, and I will kill them.
Papa Mars: You know I hid that casebook so you wouldn’t get involved, right?
Victoria Mars: So I’m supposed to just let them get away with it?
Papa Mars: No, you’re supposed to let Duke Silver and the boys do their jobs! Everyone knows you’re an amazing detective/genius now, you don’t have to die to seal the deal.
Victoria Mars:
Back at the station, Frank pulls up for a chitchat with Duke Silver. Old Timey Abagnale is going to live, but Duke Silver’s career, at least under Superintendent Slimy, might not.
Frank: I’m not sure that guy’s gonna cooperate though.
Duke Silver: Oh, he will. I’m gonna make him when I visit tomorrow. In the meantime, we have to find his prison records.
Frank: Apparently he was delirious when they brought him in. Kept saying “he’s coming” like that freakin’ horrifying
Scary Stories To Tell In the Dark "Wait Till Martin Comes" or
George Washington.
Duke Silver: Thanks, I hate it. Was he talking about the big guy?
Frank: No, some Jamaican named Moses.
Of course, this information isn’t helpful to Victoria Mars, who’s currently letting that very same fellow into her house for a meeting. He’s had to sneak in to avoid the police guards, and she has one task for him: find out everything he can about Old Timey Abagnale. Moses very obviously recognizes that name, so I can’t help but think that Frank’s lead is a red herring. We shall see. But not yet, because first we have to watch a man, unknown to us but recognized by Old Timey Abagnale, enter the forger's room and smother him with a pillow.
Is Moses good or bad? Will Victoria Mars stay out of trouble, at least a little bit? Will Duke Silver be able to solve the case without her aggressive meddling? We’ll just have to watch the season finale next week to find out!
Episode 1 Recap: I Wanna Be Sedated
Episode 2 Recap: Pocketful of Sunshine
Episode 3 Recap: It's A Man's Man's Man's World
Episode 4 Recap: You Oughta Know
