February is a time when we honor the achievements of Black people past and present, and celebrate all different types of love. But this February was particularly marked by tragedy.
There was the earthquake that devastated Turkey and Syria, a number of deadly shootings and the one-year anniversary of the war in Ukraine. Locally, Boston has been mourning two horrific acts of violence against Black people: the murder of 13-year-old Tyler Lawrence of Norwood in Mattapan, and the police beating death of Tyre Nichols in Memphis.
Through all the tragedy within Black communities and beyond, there is resilience — resilience that comes from love. To capture that, we reached out to a few people to share their love stories.
Love through child loss
LaTrelle and Tyrone Chase met in high school, but as with many couples, they debate the details of the first encounter.
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“It was ninth grade, what was it, lunch?” Tyrone said.
“Yeah, you were talking about my jacket,” LaTrelle said, laughing.
“She had a Members Only jacket,” he said.
“It was not a Members Only jacket,” she said.
The two have been married for almost 27 years, and are still just as playful with each other today.
In their time together, Latrelle and Tyrone Chase have shared joy and pain, including coming to terms with not being able to have children. LaTrelle Chase had her first miscarriage less than a year after their wedding, and her second a little over a year later. The following year, she miscarried again.
“Miscarriage and child loss is an extremely prevalent thing in the Black community,” she said. “It was extremely difficult. It was embarrassing. And it definitely tested our relationship.”
“You always want to hear the happy ending, and this is not necessarily a happy ending,” Tyrone Chase said. “But we can live through it, and it not destroy us.”
In fact, the Chases say it made their relationship stronger. It’s that will to keep going that has always carried Black people through tough times, even when they shouldn’t have had to.
Love through injustice
Rod Collins is the nephew of civil rights icon Malcolm X, who came to Boston as a teenager in the 1940s to live with his sister and Rod’s mother, Ella Little-Collins, in what is now the Malcolm X-Ella Little-Collins house in Roxbury. His family’s history led him to India in 1986. There, he met his wife, Annie, while she was working at a hotel.
“I [see] this stunning, beautiful young lady when I go to the counter and get my keys, and I caught her eyes — the eyes that went into your soul,” Rod Collins said. “Her pleasantry, her spirit, everything about her. I tried to dismiss it a little bit, but then she finally got to me.”
“The first questions that Rod asked me were ‘Can I have my keys?’ and ‘Are you married?’” Annie Collins said. “And I said ‘Yes, you can have your keys, and no, I’m not married.’”
As their relationship blossomed, Annie’s family warned things would be difficult for her in the U.S.
“My dad knew it wouldn’t be easy,” Annie Collins said. “We never traveled or anything, but my dad understood the challenges that I would have being married to a Black person in America.”
Indeed, long before hashtags and viral videos, the world knew Black people were treated differently here. But for more than 35 years, Annie has chosen to love Rod despite those challenges. She said they have endured instances of injustice, including violence inflicted on their children, Arjun and Dayorsha, by Boston police in the early 2000s.
“Supposedly, the cops said somebody called and said this tall Middle Eastern-looking girl has a gun in her bag,” she said. “And so they came in and of course, and they went to Dayorsha. Arjun, of course, reacted. And this cop, he put a gun in Arjun's back. Because he was reacting to his sister being attacked. And so, you know, it's just things like that. It always reminds me of what my dad said.”
Annie said they did not file a report about the incident.
Rod said as some of the most loving and giving people on the Earth, Black people should be judicious about who they give their love to.
It’s a sentiment echoed by his uncle in this undated speech: “We are peaceful people, we are loving people,” Malcolm X said. “We love everybody who loves us. But we don’t love anybody who doesn’t love us. We’re nonviolent with people who are nonviolent with us. But we are not nonviolent with anyone who is violent with us.”
Historically, Malcolm X's tactics have been juxtaposed against the righteous love and peaceful nonviolence characterized by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. But taking a closer look, you can see love along the entire spectrum of the struggle, even if it has to be unearthed. And when that love doesn't come from others, it's important to find it within oneself.
Self love through history
"Self-love, for me, is educating myself about being Black," said 15-year-old Ketura Joseph, a ninth grader at Brooke Charter High School in Boston.
With that education, her understanding of Black history and resilience has changed, she said.
"I always saw slavery as such a terrible thing, and I guess that changed this year for me in high school since they put more emphasis on people being brave, overcoming challenges," Joseph said. "And if you really know how to love yourself, then you can really be proud to be Black."
So here's to love and here's to Blackness, both being celebrated and persevering all month and all year long.
